“PRINCESS PEACH doesn’t want you to see this! Irrefutable PROOF that ALL of MARIO’S battles are STAGED!”

– Toad’s most recent blog entry

According to Mario lore, the Goombas originally lived peacefully with the Mushroom Kingdom before betraying them to fight for the Koopa Troop. But we’re never given a reason why or how this development occurred. Bowser, a giant turtle dragon man, only ever seems to use the Goombas as cannon-fodder in his perpetual wars. What kinship does he offer that their fellow mushroom-like Toads do not?

And yet, we have to assume the Goombas prefer this treatment to their prior life in the Mushroom Kingdom – after all, outside of the Paper Mario games, when do we ever see them on friendly terms with the Toads?

What kind of life did Bowser promise them that Princess Peach never could?

– James