But a Jape

“The spiral shell of the Wizardsbane Snail redirects all incoming magical energy towards the terminus of the spiral, where the energy can be dispersed harmlessly away from the snail. This mechanism is imperative to maintaining the armor’s anti-magical properties.”

– Gascor the Clown, on why his armor has “nipples”

Everyone knows fantasy game armor just can’t look normal – they always need giant shoulders, several spikes, wings, anything to let you know this shit’s not regular armor, it’s fantastic. And the more powerful and magical the armor is, the more fantastic it has to look. Unfortunately, there often comes a point where the art designer goes a little overboard with the art designing and the strongest armors in the game end up an ugly collection of ostentatious nonsense. Combine the strongest armor with the the strongest boots, the strongest gloves, and the strongest hat and your character’s Ass-Kicking Outfit makes even the most serious cutscene into a ridiculous slapstick comedy.

But I don’t play that game – I’m Fashion Souls all the way. If the shitty armor you find in the second dungeon is also the sickest fuckin’ fit in the game, then that’s the look I’m carrying to the end. Feitr here knows what’s up – you think he wears that single pauldron and a cape because it’s tactically sound?

– James