Shopping Online
“I mean, you could have a spatula twice as good for half the price if you just forged it yourself.”
– the actual real Spatulists
Every time I get the idea to order something online, it ends up being a months-long affair – whether it’s a video game, PC parts, or a very necessary tool for every day life. First off, I’ve gotta do research on the absolute best option – and it can’t just be reading Amazon reviews, don’t you know those can be bought and paid for? No, I’ve gotta pull up Wirecutter articles (but who knows if The New York Times knows what they’re talking about?), Good Housekeeping reviews (I have no idea who they are, but Google keeps sending me there!), Youtube reviewers (probably paid-off shills, who knows?), and multiple Reddit threads (why is the most recent thread from 2017 and only has 6 comments?!).
And then after I’ve spent all that time narrowing down my options, I still end up with the order sitting in my cart for a few weeks because, “Do I really need a new potato masher right now? I don’t eat mashed potatoes that often.” Then a few weeks later, after succumbing to a mashed potato craving and subsequently being woefully disappointed with my lumpy mashed potatoes, I end up going through the cycle again.
Honestly, it’s a gift and a curse. On one hand, it really reins in my shopping habits and keeps me from going on spending sprees. On the other hand, I end up struggling through months of deteriorating equipment just because I hate buying things on the Internet.
– James
